Film #109: JONAH HEX
1 out of 5 stars
What a mess. This should have been so cool, but instead they gave it to the guy who directed HORTON HEARS A WHO. Brolin is obviously trying his best to give a decent performance, but there’s only so much you can ask one man to do. Malkovich looks like he’d rather be ANYWHERE else than in this shitpile of a movie. And Megan Fox… well, she’s WAY hot, but copping an accent you heard on a rerun of Hee Haw is not exactly acting, honey. Shit gets blowed up for no good reason and Hex’s weapons defy both logic and reason. And WTF is up with Aidan Quinn being Ulysses S Grant? And, dude… really? Will Arnett? Tom Wopat? But then again, why question how this fiasco got made… just avoid it like the plague.